A BIT ABOUT ME
Who I am and why I'm even doing this.
​
I’m a child of the 70’s where we didn’t really have anything to play with in the house. Sure, we had bits and bobs, nothing that holds our attention like the electronic devices our kids have today. Really, outside was where we wanted to spend our time. All weathers, all seasons.
My overwhelming recollection of my youngest years is that I wanted to be outside all the time. I remember my friends parents (and indeed my own) wondering the streets of the small Lanarkshire village we grew up in, shouting our names to come in for tea and again at bed time. I also remember us all running in the opposite direction and hiding from the inevitable and comparative prison of being “back in the hoose”
I think this is where it came from, my love of the outdoors. It was stifled as I grew older and with neither of my parents encouraging or supporting any particular need for a recreational life let along in the the outdoors, slowly, these open spaces became a distant memory. But as soon as I was free of those parental limitations and could go where I wanted. I was off again...
Always a keen cyclist, I loved riding off-road on any type of bike and eventually, after taking part in my first race in 1990, I discovered my love of actual mountain biking. Whist my life after that race in Matlock, Derbyshire was not massively different straight away, my love of mountain biking has been the way everyone has defined me since and it’s how I make my living even today. As a mountain bike guide, instructor and educator.
While 2 wheels off-road is my one true love, any recreational time I spend off the bike is spent hillwalking, hiking, running, paddle boarding, bike packing, sleeping in bothies and under tarps. Though my life is busy, has limitations and obligations we all could relate to, I am increasingly trying to fit these activities in for my own enjoyment and general wellbeing.
​
Now that I mention it…
On wellbeing in particular. After in incident at work in 2005, I was referred to an occupational therapist and diagnosed with depression and generalised anxiety disorder. Once the councillor had done listing and confirming the symptoms, I found myself knowing that he was only telling me what I had been aware of my whole life. It effected me deeply. I began recalling parts of my childhood and younger years that spoke to this diagnosis.
The depression I can handle, it’s rare, I usually see it coming and I’m fairly pragmatic about it but the anxiety can be pretty crippling on a simple day to day basis. I think I hide it well, but now and again it manifests in all kinds of ways. Mostly in acts of self defence and the fear of being wrong or like someone is about to take away anything good I have. I don’t like the metaphor, but It’s like a gun to my head every day. Like the rug is about to be pulled out from under me at any minute. But I am making progress every day.
In my many years being around like-minded “outdoors people” it’s clear to me that the outdoors has a dramatic effect on the way we think, feel and interact with others and on our lives in general. I want to tell people about how I feel about it. Thats why I’m restarting the blog I left for dead around 5 years ago. A blog I started for a very different challenge altogether. I’ve chosen not to publish those posts on this site, but to leave them in the place they should be. In that past, with a different person and in a different context. If you like, you can read them here.
​
Mostly though, you’ll find a blog on the subject of my adventures. Where they take me, who I’m with and occasionally how they effect my wellbeing. This blog is also lived through my instagram account which you can follow here.
Why Ravens? Well as far back as I can remember, I’ve loved the call of ravens and crows. From the bedroom of my Papa’s (grandfathers) little house, I would lay in bed in the mornings and evenings listening to their enthusiastic cackles and laughs emanating from the trees and ruined ramparts of the dilapidated 13th century castle across road. Even now when I hear them, I think of that house, the people that came and went and my times there. It’s just a sound, but It brings me a genuine feeling of warmth and comfort.
Later in life I read this description of these birds. At the time I thought it described me well.
"Ravens are found in wooded areas as well as remote regions, on the tundra, rocky cliffs, mountain forests, desert canyons and on the open plains, anywhere the trail beckons. Ravens are intelligent. They possess the ability to solve problems. They learn from trial and error, the manipulation of objects, imitation and insight.
Ravens are dynamic, playful and determined. They talk all the time and can make a number of unusual noises."
I’ll leave you with that as your first impression and assure you that all images I use are taken or owned by me and my words are also my own. If you want to contact me you can do so here or via instagram here.
hope you can find the time to check in on my journey now and again.
​
Allan